The Unwelcome Guest

My conscience was under redevelopment
And I had visitors in the new home I built,
They came and go, some stayed for long,
But the unwelcome guest never left.

The unwelcome guest stayed in the bottom cellar,
Which was there in the pit of my stomach,
Isolated it was, as there was no room
To notice it, with the other visitors.

The unwelcome guest was often hungry,
But it had learnt to oppress its hunger,
Because in the dining room in my heart,
There were other guests being fulfilled.

Until one day, there was silence,
Etching onto the corners of my stomach,
The hunger of the unwelcome guest could no longer be suppressed,
It made its way to the dining room.

The seats were empty and the shadows lurked,
My conscience was now a building out of order,
I have learnt to fix what’s broken and I solve equations I get accidently right,
But the unwelcome guest has cast a shadow so dark,
Every light has ushered out,
The chandeliers in my heart don’t sparkle anymore.

There are no visitors willing to stay,
Everything is intact but nothing is right,
But the unwelcome guest remains ghosted,
Until one day.

As the unwelcome guest wants to take over,
And become the owner of the house I’ve grown till now,
Which though is out of order right now,
With the unwelcome guest pulling the reins,
My home will destroy to ruins.

The unwelcome guest can’t be fed anymore – as it has become the feeder,
It is eating at me and every part I call home
And leaving me with my veins ripped off,

It’s waiting for the pain to become so deep
that it’ll become a habit to master over time,
The only thing I feel would be emptiness,
Because pain would be the habit which will become me,
And the only feeling I’ll ever feel, but yet not a feeling.

The unwelcome guest cannot be defeated,
As hatred is what I deserve,
I have tried too hard to be someone I think I was
But now I know I am nothing,
But a puppet in the hands of this guest I did not invite.

The dining room has turned into an empty stage,
The windows are shut and the roof at a endless height,
The dust of the diner’s footsteps are hiding behind faded curtains,
The path is now paved with broken glass

As the unwelcome guest has become my owner,
My soul is surrendered to that invisible face,
Which has been proving me wrong since the day I believed,
That peace was something I could achieve.


Hello everyone! I had written this one a while back however I am posting it now. This poem is a fictional piece of work, with the concept of ‘the unwelcome guest’ being the central motif, that is a concept, idea, object which repeats itself throughout the text and is hence recurring.

The poem begins with the setting of a well- built house, with the unwelcome guest not being prominent due to being kept buried by the owner. However, gradually the factors the owners held on to for not dealing with the unwelcome guest eventually moved away which paved way for the unwelcome guest to take control, rather than the owner having the chance to deal with the unwelcome guest.

The main motive for writing this poem was to display the disturbing effects of the negative feelings inside us, and how keeping it buried does more harm than good.

Yes, it is important to have a perspective to understand our thoughts and emotions and our very being, but it is alright to not have an immediate perspective about everything, and sometimes feeling your negative emotions is the only way to gain needed perspective.


P.S – Am I the only one who is totally obsessed with the ‘evermore‘ album by Taylor Swift? It feels like it was only yesterday when ‘folklore‘ came out (which I am still not done obsessing with) and now we have evermore. If creating two albums in a year especially the year being 2020 is not an achievement then I don’t know what is.
Check them both out on Spotify here!

And here, I end this post. You can contact me here and I will reply as soon as possible!

Thank you for reading!
Follow, comment and share!
@theniharikadiaries

Congratulations, You Made It!

Photo by Tim Swaan on Unsplash

Dear Reader,

I just have one question for you, which may sound more of a statement/reminder than a question, but here you goes: Would the puzzle of what to look forward to in the next year have truly mattered if we did not go through what we did this year?

To me, it wouldn’t have. Because until now, almost everything had been the same, fundamentally. But this year, there was a change in everything. Uncertainity has been the only thing certain this year and to know is there any uncertainity to look forward to in the next year is a puzzle indeed.

But while 2020 has marked havoc, distress, pain, it has also symbolized mental unity, strength, and resilience. It has taught most of us many lessons and made us learn something which we had forgotten to do in our hectic routines — pause. This year has forced us to slow down and actually see everything around us. Yes, this year has hurt, a lot. It truly has but here you are, breathing, managing, surviving.

If there is anything I wish to look forward to in the year 2021, it is neither normalcy nor consistency.

It is my opinion, and I do not ask you to agree with me but this year has made me believe that normalcy is overrated. Predictability is overrated. I have learnt to believe our inability to pause and stay mindful has made us too “comfortable” in our routines. Think about it. We had a terrible year! There is no denying that. But if there is one thing we can all try to feel a little good about is the valuable lessons we took away from this year.

I believe 2020 was an effort to provoke everything we hold important and valuable. To shake our minds and make us question the world within which we live and what we imbibe every day from it. And in the midst of a silent wave of insanity, we drew strength. We chose to try to stay grateful and self-reflect, let go; to bring about good changes in things that are in our control. We did everything we could and although things have not gotten better in a literal sense, I believe we can all find one reason — whatever be it, for us to hold our head up high and walk out of this mess we call 2020.

This year was a battle we did not choose, but it is the battles we do not choose which turn out to be the toughest, and in turn, make us stronger in a way we do not even realize. And we have made it ‘til the end, and this has shaped you — whether you realize it or not.

And therefore, I have decided to try and use this opportunity of looking forward to look forward to the uncertainty.

No, I am not asking for this year to repeat itself. But I have chosen to look forward to the possibility of impossibility, nothing and everything, good changes. I have decided to look forward to new beginnings. New challenges, new storms, new situations. I look forward to embracing the uncertainty. To telling stories of how this year was just incredibly peculiar and hopefully have it as just a memory. I look forward (not really) to being confused, puzzled and at bewildering crossroads. I look forward to writing more and hoping for a more convenient change and being as blessed as I have been until now. I look forward to strength, gratefulness and staying mindful.

This year has been bad for all of us and some of us have had it even worse. I will neither have nor give false hopes; we never know what can happen. But if there is one thing we can hope for ourselves in the coming year: becoming stronger individuals. To me, 2020 has been less of a year and more of a situation, where I have spent most of its span in the cliche “figuring out.” And ironically, this has shaped us positively unlike the events of the year. And it has made all of us stronger whether you have realized it or not. I can assure you that.

However, if I have offended anyone with my words, I deeply apologize. I did not intend on doing so. I have just presented my personal opinions, and they do not mean to hurt any of the reader’s sentiments.


Originally publshed in ‘A Cornered Gurl’ in response to the ‘Young Minds of Medium 2021 Hopes and Dreams’ Challenge

Hello everyone! Wish you all a happy and prosperous New Year! As much as we all had our struggles amplified in this year, 2020 was definitely a year to remember. Just look back in retrospect, can you really believe this is the year that went by? To be very honest, I cannot. If someone asked me to imagine myself in a hypothetical 2020 before 2020, I would’ve deemed it to be impossible. I guess it’s not!
Thank you so much for reading guys! Peace and blessings. Xoxo

Feel free to let me know your thoughts in the comment section! You can reach out to me here too.

Follow, comment and share!
@theniharikadiaries

Scarred Nights

brown rocky mountain photography

Photo by eberhard grossgasteiger on Pexels.com

My thickest voids scream into
The toxic visions of reality,
They dwell on the highs and escapes;
As I dive into my consciousness,
And search within the dark waters.
Every corner,
Every cliff,
Just,
One metaphor.
That’s all I need right to describe
My poetic hallucinations.

I am drifted on this island,
where everything I see is controlled by
the puppet master inside my head.
Grey clouds and raging storms,
With swirling letters once thrown away.

I did not choose to envision these disturbing sceneries,
But they happen to be the things that control me.
My insatiable sanity stirs my soul into delusions,
And spins a web of beautiful lies to make suicide seem noble.

I rip the pillow covers of their burden,
of soaking my emotions every night,
The chains break in their efforts
To bar my soul so it doesn’t free itself,
Of the magical metaphors I write to survive.

I maintained hope,
But it consumed me.
My every breath tripped,
Along the crevices of the cliffs
Of high expectations,
I had from myself.
Hope came crashing down
And ghosted itself behind dusty corners,
As I crumbled,
Piece by piece,
Every shred of my sanity,
Being stripped down till nothing but a deep void.

I am told,
Whenever you describe your dark parts in a poem,
Say “demon”.
Defeat them,
And you emerge victorious.
But if I do,
I won’t live to see the party.
Because I am that demon to be erased,
I am the metaphor,
Balancing on my grave.

Gratitude Post!

gratitude final

Hello Guys! Yes, a year back I joined WordPress and today is my one-year anniversary!
And this post is just an effort to make you readers know my gratitude towards you all.

We’re in tough times right now and these tiny moments of hope and joy somehow provide us strength and something to be grateful for. In this whole universe of bleak misfortunes and pain, I live in a small world, and I’m lucky to be blessed, healthy and breathing in that fraction of the universe. I’m grateful to you all, and even though there are a million things I can be morose about, these simple and small moments like just listening to the sounds of the rain, simply sitting together with my family, having this notification of a one-year achievement, make me feel happy in their own special way. And I’m sorry if I don’t say it often but thank you so much for being a constant support and reading whatever I post on this blog. I am very grateful to have you as my reader and without you I’m nothing. Thank you for all your suggestions, appreciations and the thoughts you’ve presented in the comment sections, I deeply value them. Thank you for your beautiful kindness 🙂

And today, that’s what I want to write a little about. Gratitude. The tiny speck of light which can make you feel so much better and bring you hope. If we think about it, there’s always a cliche ‘bright side’ to everything. When we get through pain, it makes us stronger individuals. And if we try to hold on to a positive approach towards negative things, we can be grateful and find a way to draw hope. This doesn’t mean being positive about a negative thing, it only means to have an approach towards the negativity which is positive. If you’re feeling any negativity, pain or emptiness, having a positive approach means accepting that pain and not being in denial of it or refusing to feel the pain.

Having a positive approach means allowing yourself to feel the pain as you know it’s only going to make you stronger.

And it is our ability to have a positive approach towards the negative things in life which defines our strength and hence the ability to be grateful.

I do not intend to be insensitive or hurt anyone by my words because there will be times when we cannot be grateful and that is completely okay. There will be times we end up being so deeply buried inside the pain it starts to feel you’re within your own grave stuck in bleak madness without any ray of hope. I won’t say I know how it feels because I truly cannot. But I understand, and what I do know that it is okay and you will get through it and you deserve to see the light because you have so much of strength within you and you will get through this battle. Do not give up.

I will end this post now but before I do, I want to know, from all you readers what are you grateful for. What moments have brought you joy in your little world? And has practicing gratitude helped you during times when you felt low? I wanna know your story and I hope you share it.

Thank you so much for reading! I hope you’re blessed and safe.


You can contact me here.
I’m open to all your thoughts and opinions.
Thank you!
@theniharikadiaries

Liebster Award

Hello, fellow bloggers!

I am glad to tell you all that I’ve been nominated for the ‘Liebster Award’ by Mrs. Tangie T. Woods through her website Mrs. T’s Corner on WordPress. I request you all to check out her blog, her words soothe you, her faith in the Lord is pure and inspiring. Thank you ma’am for the nomination. I am grateful.

Rules:

1. Thank the blogger who nominated you.
2. Share a few facts about yourself.
3. Answer blogger’s questions.
4. Nominate other bloggers that inspire you.
5. Ask your nominees a few questions.
6. Notify your nominees of their nomination.

My name is Niharika Gursahani and I’ll be fourteen this year. Writing is something very close to my heart and I write me on these blogs, I’m just an amateur writer, I’m not deeply familiar with literature, poetry forms, but I read. I enjoy reading, and reading many blogs on WordPress has honed my love for writing and reading even more, and learn and grow.

Mrs. Woods’ Questions:

1. What is your favourite thing to blog about?
A specific favourite doesn’t come to mind, I blog whatever inspires to me write in the first place.

2. What would be one thing that you would change that you did in your life?
I wish I’d found about Jeffrey Archer earlier!

3. What is your favorite food to cook?
I don’t cook much, but I’m happy to help my parents when they cook. But making a simple cheese sandwich and eating it does bring me peace.

4. What does love from God mean to you?
I believe when you have love from God, you believe in yourself, and have faith in yourself. You have hope and strength. You feel peaceful and can deal with negativity with a calm approach. You learn the uniqueness of conscience, and accept that people are different and have different reactions. You do not use use humanity, your own or another’s as a means to some end, like to attain pleasure or reduce pain, essentially only for your benefit. You act that you use humanity, whether in your own person or in the person on any other, always at the same time as an end, never merely as a means. You learn that the things that are truly important are the ones which are unconditional.

5. Hot dogs or hamburgers?
Neither

6. What is your favorite TV show to watch?
I love F.R.I.E.N.D.S! It’s my favourite sitcom and I’m a big fan.

7. What would you be doing if snow came to your city?
I would go outside and play! And then have coffee, of course.

8. What are you thankful for?
I’m thankful to be blessed by the people in my life, my family, friends, all the bloggers who inspire me and give their honest opinions to help me grow everyday. I’m thankful for life, all the love, all the memories, the happiness, the pain, I’m thankful for it all.

9. How long have you been blogging and how were you inspired?
I’ll complete one year this June.
I always wanted to blog, but I never thought that I’d start so soon. My sister had got a new cell in which WordPress was a built-in app. I knew that WordPress was a good app for blogging purposes, so I just did it, and if I would find it burdening, I would delete the site. But I didn’t! So here I am.
10. What country do you live in and for how long?
I live in India. I’ve lived here since I was born, so almost fourteen years.

11. What is your favorite food?
Nothing in specific

12. If you had a chance to do something over what would it be?
Nothing that comes to my mind.


I nominate the following with the same questions:

This has been great! Thank you again Mrs. Tangie, thank you very deeply.

Sunshine Blogger Award

Hello, fellow bloggers!

It gives me immense pleasure to tell you that I’ve been nominated for the ‘Sunshine Blogger Award’ by Riya Gupta through her website WorldOfMyThoughts on WordPress. I request you all to check out her amazing blog of her unique words. Thank you so much Riya, for this nomination. I am so grateful to you.

images

RULES

  • Thank the blogger who nominated you and provide a link back to their blog.
  • List the Rules and display an award logo on your blog post.
  • Answer the 11 Questions the Blogger has asked you.
  • Nominate 11 New Blogs to receive the award and notify them by comment on any of their posts.
  • Ask the Nominees 11 New Questions.

Riya’s questions:

  1. What is your favorite writer and why ? I don’t have any particulars, my favourite writer constantly changes. Right now, it’s Jefferey Archer. I read his book ‘A Prisoner of Birth’, and it is the best book I’ve read my whole life. I think it’s because of his gripping plots and the way he puts his words and crafts the illusion. I’m currently reading his book ‘False Impressions’.
  2. What is your dream occupation ? Music Therapist, Teaching
  3. Who inspires you the most ? My mother and Mr. Yash Nahar
  4. What does happiness mean to you ? Happiness to me, is knowing that life can never be perfect and will always have its ups and downs, so live in the moment, and cherish the spirit of the positive energy you have right now. It’s a choice and it comes from hardwork and solving problems.
  5. What genre of movies do you watch the most and why ? Suspense thrillers, because they manage to create this wonderful aura which keeps me hooked and continues being interesting enough to always make me want to watch more
  6. Do you keep up with climate change events ? Yes, I do. My mother is an environmentalist and hence get to know about it through my mother.
  7. Do you know who Greta Thunberg is ? Yes, I do. She is such an amazing person and I love her cause! Hats off to her courage and dedication. One of the many qualities of a true leader.
  8. Who is your favorite blogger ? I don’t have a certain favorite, plenty of bloggers whose posts always leave me in appreciation.
  9. What is your favorite cartoon character and why ? Jerry, I relate with him
  10. What is your number one fun activity ? Series marathons with my mother
  11. Who is your top choice for the best musical act ? None

    Great! Thank you so much dear, I am so grateful to you. The bloggers I wish to nominate:

Ancient Skies

Allison Marie Conway

Luna

Craig Lock

Accidental Blogger

trE

Samyak Singh

Brad Osborne

Anonymously Hal

Simran Sawant

These are all the bloggers I wish to nominate. I ask them the same questions.


When The Heavens Whispered

heaven whispers

Photo Credits – Pinterest

It rained,
The pink of the flowers melted into a mystical mauve of matte,
As the skies spilled their tales into a cascade of condensated love,
The soil gained a unique freshness and sprayed the air with the calmness of a mended soul,
And the edges of the leaves curved concave,
As the nectar of the sapphire sky slept unto the moss green bed,
And they shone emerald green just like your eyes,
Only that I just saw the exquisite beauty of the emerald,
And never saw your true stone-self.

I feel the beguiling beads drop,
From the heavenly realm of jewels on my bruised skin,
It penetrated my heart when those beads quenched my thirst as they fell unto my lips,
The maple syrup of the sky,
Now reminding me of the maple of your mouth on my dry lips,
And the way it tasted,
As it gushed gradually down my throat and my tongue craved more,
Because your caressing hands on my shoulder took the weight of the world off them.
I sighed with satisfaction while this alluring peace my soul absorbed,
Like waffles absorb maple syrup.

But who knew that your nectar would drench me and slowly drip my self-esteem,
But then again, I was blithely unaware,
That your maple was poison in guise of the sweet bliss of your lips,
Breaking the waffle of my heart into shattered crumbles.

I drown myself in the tranquility of this secluded paradise,
I let the skies bleed purple shades of hidden bruises,
They blend into the amber of the threshold of the bijou empire,
It’s not raining anymore.

My lungs came to savour the breath of freedom,
I let the streams of the translucent skies dilute the colors of my tainted galaxy,
I ingested the shattered showers,
Because I was tired of my own tears quenching my thirst.

Maybe the soil will absorb the peace,
And the prying eyes will once again self-hydrate,
But my throat is nauseous of the taste of my lacrimal salts,
I won’t let heartbleed be my life’s sole flavour.

I’ll be a warrior and I’ll embrace my scars,
With heartbreak as my healing balm,
I won’t be a prisoner of your love,
I’ll let the rains take my misery.


Originally posted on Medium via ACorneredGurl, you can check it out here!

‘Ello Guys! Yes, I know, I’ve been posting after a really long time. Like a really, really long time but my final terminal examinations are in progress and have kept me busy. My last paper’s on 27th February and I promise to seriously dedicate myself to this blog since that day, plus my holidays will start from then therefore will have plenty of time to surprise you and keep you tuned! I seriously apologize for the inconsistency.


Follow, comment and share!

Suggestions welcome!

Thank you for reading!

@theniharikadiaries

The Rhapsody of The Blues


An archaic tune playes over the dusty radio,
Reminds me of a dwindling duet I almost forgot a second back,
Every cosmic binder of the universe,
Wants me to never forget the rhapsody of our love.

Our rhapsody was melodious,
The tune was full of life,
And the lyrics of this rhapsody,
Were the loving letters I wrote you.

This rhapsody hit me hard,
But somewhere in the lyrics we drift apart,
And the bridge we built with committed chords,
Collapsed as you broke the guitar strings.

This rhapsody was our lover’s call,
I sang it and it beckoned you to me when I needed you,
And you followed my voice and sang along and gave me comfort,
But now when my ears sense this tune of the Blues,
They bleed a stream of shattered love.
And I scream louder than breaking glass.

Pillows don’t comfort me the way I was comforted,
When I cried into your arms and soaked your shirt in those tears,
My pillow only absorbs my pain but doesn’t relieve me of it,
The way you did when your chest was my only pillow.

I can hear your voice hiss through the corridors of my brain,
Corridors painted your favorite colour with our pictures hung up on the walls,
With this now irritable rhapsody playing in the ballroom of my mind,
Which is my destination to be in hallucinations,
When drowning in insomnia,
Dreaming of you in my arms,
Dancing an endless dance.

I can’t sing a note no more,
My throat is blunt of unspoken words,
The rhapsody of our love burns me down to a soulless spirit,
And this spirit can’t survive with her soul anymore.
You are my soul.
I can’t sing the Blues anymore,
Because you tore apart my vocal cards.
Pain is the only note I could produce,
But now I have a heart of stone and a spirit devoid of love,
Which has no voice of it’s own.


I can never caese my love for you,
You are my life and you are my death,
And now that the rhapsody has lost its life,
I dream of only death,
As I gulp down a handful of pills,
Drug me of a faraway fantasy,
This fantasy which I can only achieve,
With the sacrifice of my present life.

And the pills start their deadly effects,
As my body slowly turns into stone like my heart,
I am nothing but a mere corpse,
As grim darkness crawls upto the ceiling walls,
And as the noises intensify of the dead spirit’s desperate insanity,
I still hear over the drunken voids,
Rhapsody which still plays over the dusty     radio..

Greetings fellow bloggers! Across this wonderful interactive platform, I came across a publication named ACorneredGurl started by Miss Tremaine Loadholt. Here, I was made aware of Young Minds of Medium, wherein the youth can submit their unique pieces according to certain challenges. This time, the challenge was ‘How Do You Sing The Blues’ and this was the poem I wrote. The minimum required age was 15 and Miss Tre accepted me as a writer in her impeccable magazine despite me being 13. My wholehearted regards to her. She has so kindly blessed me with her generous and beautiful nature.

I hope you all take out the time to read this one😊
*********************
Thank you for your support!

Suggestions welcome!

Follow, comment and share!

@theniharikadiaries 🙂

An Ode to Examinations

The ink of scratching pens spilling onto the crisp parchment,
A hurried agony of mulled up words,
Embedded in your brain during the cicada’s screech in the previous pitched night,
Showered with caffeine shots to last the term.

Pensiveness penetrating the dead silence,
With you sleepily sunken in thoughts,
Every sentence improvised from your hazy recollections,
Of great importance in this examination paper.

An examination paper,
Is annoyingly questionable,
Stirring your mind with confusion deeper in every word,
Thoroughly analysing your ability to perserve,
Interrogating your every move,
With the shadow of the invigilator diminishing your desire to turn.

The walls of the examination hall,
Reflect the blankness of my mind into the seeped voids,
These voids which reside beside every student,
Absorb their thoughts and create a barrier,
Which restrict you from all kinds of awareness unto your conscience,
Making you unknown of the silent chaos in the examination room.

My mind breeds in these melancholic vibes,
Trying to produce legitimacy in the words I cough out on the dry pages,
Deeply I regret of not having learnt that worksheet,
As I beat around the bush,
Trying to recall what was written in that wee box at the bottom,
As I witness the wordless sheet in front of my sleepy eyes,
And the anguish in my heart intensifies.

I want to escape this gruesome state,
I can’t wait for the clock to strike twelve,
For that’s when I leave this gloomy room,
With the loitering invigilators ceasing their wide gaze,
With every student giving them a vanquished look on their way out.

There’s a rumble of question papers in the noisy corridor as soon as I leave that horrendous hell,
Plenty mistakes realised, some lucky guesses gaining accuracy,
Many beliefs being broken, and many hopes being risen,
After I give that enigmatic parchment to the academic Gods.

Who shall testify my intelligence and punish me using the magical red in their quills,
My fate hangs in their balance,
And all I can do now is wait,
For the verdict to come its way,
Which will decide my life or death,
When I’ll momentarily glance over the alloted marks, hoping for the best.


So providing a brief explanation due to popular demand😂, this poem is written to shed light on the atmosphere of an examination hall, and how a student is so immersed in thoughts, that he’s unaware of everything going on around especially the time. As a student, I tried to portray the aftermath and the preparation done for the examination as from what I’ve observed. Though the poem doesn’t express the mentality of each and every student in the hall, I’ve tried my best to pose a usual perspective on examinations.

The poem also indirectly hints at the unnecessity of taking stress during exams. A little nervousness and tension is perfectly alright, but,

An examination only examines your ability, and doesn’t determine it.

Marks don’t define you. But yes, hardwork is a necessity for success.

[…And cheating in the examination hall.. Usually not preferred😂]

******************

Thank you for your support!

Suggestions welcome!

Follow, comment and share!

@theniharikadiaries 🙂

Dust

Your ample words, and the horrifying motives hidden vaguely behind them,
Act like a sieve for my thoughts and emotions,
My every bit of sanity you’re extracting from my brain,
You are making me lose control as I cry out loud to the forlorn universe in which I’m dying.

My ripped soul’s translucent tears,
Evaporating into the empty voids,
Precipitate the hazy atmospheres of my brains,
And it rains.
It pours heavily.
Their stone-hearted cold criticism floods through my conscience with rage,
With every puddle of anguish within absorbing my mind’s peace.

Yes, I’m different.
My soul’s scarred with a million miserable cuts,
Blood streaming out from these suicidal scars,
Red paintings on my parched skin,
And oh! Such an immense bittersweet relief I perceive,
From these habitual portrayals of huge, red masterpieces,
Painted painfully by my blue-green veins.
The veins which bind me to reality,
But I hate this reality,
because it has you.

Scrutinizing every deed of mine,
So unfairly you treat me and drown me in despair,
Hence today I shall free myself of this reality I’m enforced to believe are of my own choices,

You thrived on the thought that you could control me,
Use me,
Betray me,
Torture me.

But now I will finally be free,
For I shall expose the deadened veins of my neck to fresh open air,
Which I breathed in, and urged me to swallow, and not let out,
The blood I produced in every breath taken in this atrocious atmosphere,
But I shan’t allow myself these bloody lumps of guilt to taste anymore,
I will finally now bleed to my death and your profound joy and rest in your grim grave with pleasure.

My freezing body is collapsed in front of your feet,
I’m making you witness eternal peace,
You walked over my identity, my personality, my feelings and mercilessly hurt me,
You unreasonably desired to gain control over me.

So finally now my mortal body is surrendered to you,
I am dead.
Finally devoid.
It’s so easy

So walk over me,
“Bless me” with your chapped feet,
Stamp on my soulless hollow lungs and shoulders,
And make me bleed my heart out.
Puncture my limbs and eyes out of their places,
Tear my scars and bruises apart,
Wound me deeper,
Snap my neck and torment me further.
Grasp your evil dagger and gleefully into my soul thrust.
Fulfill your lust,
Finish me, demolish me, and crumble me to dust.


This poem is to emphasize on how intense a person’s feelings can get on being criticised on every single thing. The people judging them for everything they lack do not realise that they’re hurting them.

It’s important that people realise that nobody can be perfect or be exactly matching the expectations of perfection, and it is not even required to be perfect. We all are unique and have the right to have our own beliefs and the right to choose for ourselves.

We all have a spark inside us, a reason to stay alive and survive. Embrace yourselves. Nobody can do a better version of you than you yourself. You are perfect in your imperfections. Thrive in your inner beauty.

To all those people battling and struggling in all sorts of wars in their lives, you unknowingly inspire millions of hearts and give them hope and courage. So have courage, have hope, and know you’re the best💞

******************

Thank you for your support!

Suggestions welcome!

Follow, comment and share!

@theniharikadiaries 🙂